I’m not sure this is necessarily going to be one of those “where were you when you heard Steve Jobs died” sort of things or not. But I know I’ll always remember. I had just finished dinner, grabbed my iPhone and read this tweet.

My heart immediately sunk.

I went to Apple’s homepage to see this.

“Damn. Too soon.” That is all I could think.

My History with Apple

Apple Computer is one of those companies that has always been in my life. In 1980 I went to kindergarden in rural Montana to find one Apple II Plus in the classroom. The first time the school had ever had a computer and certainly the first time I’d ever seen one.

I only bought one non-Apple computer (a “PC”) in the 30 years since. It lasted less than a year.

But I didn’t order my Apple Fanboy card until after Steve Jobs returned to the company.

3 Lessons I’ve learned from Steve Jobs

1. Popular Opinions Don’t Mean &^%$

When Steve Jobs returned to Apple in 1997 the company launched the famous Think Different campaign.

“Here’s to the crazy ones. The rebels. The troublemakers. The ones who see things differently. While some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.”

What a message. It was powerful and inspring; especially as someone who had just left home and was off to explore the world.

And it was vintage Jobs. The year before he was pushed from Apple his company aired the most famous ad in television, 1984.

And Jobs always believed it was his mission to tell us what we wanted. Not the other way around.

He had no time for the guru’s or experts or naysayers. He knew what was right. And #$%& you if you’re too dumb to get it.

Its rare to be able to listen to your inner voice when everyone else is telling you to go in another direction.

2. Beauty Matters

This is the wrong title; but its something like that.

Making art is important. And everything else follows it. Function. Profit. Good business sense.

I have no doubt that Steve Jobs saw himself as an artist before he saw himself as many things. Beauty mattered to Steve Jobs. Whether it be the software or the hardware, it had to be beautiful. Not just ascetically, but also functionally.

I bought my first non-Apple computer just a few months before Steve Jobs returned as CEO of the company. There was nothing special about this Compaq laptop. Nothing inspiring. After Jobs returned he released the iMac and then the PowerMac G3.

They were beautiful. And after I ordered the PowerMac G3 I stood stunned at the box alone upon arrival.

But its beauty was also in its simplicity. There was this door that opened the side of the computer where I could access everything. No screws. No screwdrivers. No scratches. Just… a door.

Anyone can pick up an Apple device and it just works. That’s beautiful.

3. Follow Your Dreams

As far as I know, Steve Jobs has only once just talked about life publicly. In 2005 at Stanford University Jobs gave the commencement address. The year before he had been diagnosed with the cancer that I’m assuming lead to his death today.

His message was simple. Life is too damn short to live someone else’s life. Follow your path. Follow your dreams.

Its so cliché.

But here was a man who did exactly that and changed the world. How could you not listen?

I’m still trying to listen.

Steve… ugh! You will be missed.

The whole situation makes me wonder what I’m supposed to do. How do I deal with this as someone who loves them both? Will I have to choose sides? I honestly don’t know…

I’ve known Google since the Fall of 1999 when I was introduced by one of my favorite English professors who was an avid technologist as well as a scholar. Google was so simple, so Zen (but with colors and flare), so nerdy girl how could we not hit it off right away? And like many awkwards do, Google seemed to transform into a stone cold fox as maturity came. I still see Google everyday. I get directions. I find old college professors. And Google works at my business a lot too (Voice, Apps, etc).

But I’ve known Apple longer. I grew up with Apple. In my tiny little elementary school in rural MT sat an Apple II where I learned simple math and how to play the Oregon Trail. And with any mature relationship its had its ups and downs. In fact, when it came time for me to spread my wings and leave the house to buy my first personal computer I left Apple for something called Windows 95. Its a mistake I still regret. But it was the first and last time I ever made it. And of course Apple welcomed me back 3 years later when I bought my Blue and White G3. And today Apple lives with me. In my living room, in my pocket, in my office and even in the bedroom (that’s AppleTV, iPhone, MacBook and iMac).

I can’t imagine choosing. Please don’t make me. You two really are better together than apart. Google, with your amazing web services and Apple with your incredible design and commitment to excellence. You inspire me and make me better at what I do. I need you both… and I need you together.